No, He Didn’t, but…Yes, He Did–My Look at Some Obama Internet Rumors

Oh, the freaking internet. It is a blessing and a curse on our society.

When used for the right purpose, it can be a streaming, endless library of information and entertainment. When used for the wrong purpose, however, it can be a pointless stream of crud.

So why wasn’t I surprised when I heard the supposed rumor that Barack Obama demanded to be sworn in to the Senate on a Quran, and not the Bible?

That’s something I’ve heard from a few people I’ve transported on the job. The first time I heard it, it sounded wrong. Yet when I heard it again tonight–nearly word for word, the exact same rumor–it sounded like it was something that some people (read: hard-right conservatives) were trying out on potential Obama supporters that would attempt to cast doubts in their minds. It sounded too much like a rehearsed script.

Of course, this BS was refuted long ago, but it still permeates through a lot of conservative cycles. And when I hear the exact same thing repeated in a melodic tone, that is when my BS meter goes into Defcon 5.

I’m not glued to CNN/Fox/MSNBC/CSPAN/PBS most of the time, but I’m certain that, had that happened, I would have known and heard something about it at some point four years ago.

Here’s the thing: it never happened. In fact, it turns out that this is someone playing Mike Walker’s “Gossip Game”, mixing up the real story and names, and then passing it off as fact in a viral email plot.

As Kevin Bacon once said in “A Few Good Men”, the facts of the case are these: Obama was never sworn in on a Quran, nor did he “demand” it. The retard(s) that sent this email got the wrong guy. The story is true, but the names were changed to denigrate the innocent.

So the question is: just who was that man who wanted to be sworn in on a Quran?

A DFL’er from Minnesota named Ellison. Congressman Keith Ellison.

In fact, there was an entire blowup in November of 2006 over that, remember? Dennis Prager (and a few other conservative heads) went ballistic over the fact that Ellison wanted to bring a Quran to take a swearing-in photo with House Speaker Nancy Pelosi.

(FYI: House members aren’t sworn in individually—that would take forever, considering there’s 435 of them to swear in—so the do the official swear-in as a group, and they take some ceremonial photos.)

Oh, and for all the yelling and kvetching that conservatives were doing at the time, Ellison took the photo with a Quran owned by…Thomas Jefferson.

Now, I know I didn’t hear those loudmouths dare try and denigrate Jefferson.

Constitutional hypocrite (amongst a sea of them) Roy Moore (Judge Ten Commandments) demanded that Congress not allow Ellison to take his seat. Shows what kind of judge that Moore was (and why he was removed from the bench in the first place), as that action would have violated Article XI, Sec. 3 of the Constitution:

The Senators and Representatives before mentioned, and the Members of the several State Legislatures, and all executive and judicial Officers, both of the United States and of the several States, shall be bound by Oath or Affirmation, to support this Constitution; but no religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States.

 

In other words, the Constitution and the Founding Fathers just told those religious conservatives berating Ellison to halt and shut up with their Bible talk. The only Oath that Congress has to affirm to as they are sworn in as congresspersons is as follows:

 

I do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter.

Who said anything about Bibles? If they wanted to be sworn in on the local Yellow Pages, or on a Papa John’s pizza box (not that they would choose either, for obvious reasons) it’s fine—just so they support the Constitution of the United States; not the fabricated constitution of petulant, imperious and duplicitous talking heads of uber-conservative and religious persuasion, who pretend to support the real Constitution.

Which leads me back to Obama: even in 2004, had Barack Obama really demanded to be sworn into the Senate on a Quran, wouldn’t we have heard an angry, venomous missive from Limbaugh, Hannity, O’Reilly, Savage, Ingraham, et al, at the moment they found out about it, as Prager and others did to Ellison in 2006? Wouldn’t it have lead headlines in every other paper, or been the topic of discussion of every cable news channel known to man? And wouldn’t that one flareup have reduced his candidacy for President of the United States to merely a concept, and not what it is today?

Duh.

This makes this Obama/Quran rumor all the more preposterous, and it proves that their intended audiences are fools for believing it, for given the vast sphere and narrow scope of conservative media networks, the audience would have known about it before it hit their inbox, rendering the email unnecessary. It depends on the audience to be stupid, not do a fact check, and trust the faulty information. (Not to mention the fear-mongering and race-baiting.) I never trust half the crap that sits in my inbox, or on message boards, and that’s where this comes from. But then, the people who think this is gospel might also think some guy is setting aside a king’s ransom for them in Asia, too. But I digress.

As for the “not saluting the flag” photo? Sigh…yeah, that happened, but…let’s be honest about this, shall we?

How many Americans actually memorized United States Code Title 36 Chapter 3 in their citizenship/government studies classes? I’m guessing not that many. But here it is:

 

United States Code Title 36 Chapter 3 — National Anthem, Motto, Floral Emblem, and March

 

§301. National anthem; Star-Spangled Banner

The composition consisting of the words and music known as The Star-Spangled Banner is designated the national anthem of the United States of America.

Conduct during playing — During rendition of the national anthem—

 

• when the flag is displayed —

1. all present except those in uniform should stand at attention facing the flag with the right hand over the heart;
2. men not in uniform should remove their headdress with their right hand and hold the headdress at the left shoulder, the hand being over the heart; and
3. individuals in uniform should give the military salute at the first note of the anthem and maintain that position until the last note; and
4. when the flag is not displayed, all present should face toward the music and act in the same manner they would if the flag were displayed.

So, yes—Obama officially violated the code. I guess that flub alone eliminates him from “Presidential Final Jepoardy!”, right?

I have a suggestion for those who want to disqualify him from seeking higher office over this: the next time you attend a baseball game, or any athletic event, take note of each player you see not following USC Title 36 Chap. 3, Sec 3a (without violating the code yourself, that is). Then call the police. See if they care.

And if we’re going to start questioning his patriotism by violating the flag code, then Jon Huntsman, Jr., the current governor of Utah, needs to be impeached, for half-staffing a flag in honor of a religious leader—a violation of the flag code, USC Title 4, Chap. 1, Sec. 7m.

You say no? Then what’s the point of all this?

[A: To paint Obama as a secret Muslim-loving spy of Al-Qaeda, a ruthless terrorist organization determined to rule the world...]

It’s all just another edition of “American Grandstand”, where the conservatives are trying to pass themselves off as The Patriots of America, in all it’s subliminal glory. Ask Max Cleland how that tastes. Ask John Kerry.

I, for one, am confident that Obama would follow the Constitution and the Flag Code if elected president. That is unless Senator McCain or Senator Clinton know something I don’t, and it turns out later that Barack Obama is actually Kenyan for Lord Voldemort or something.